2005/9/4 Conversation with my dad

J=Jung
B=Ben

On Nature, On God...

J: so why do u think God let things happen like this
B: it has nothing to do with God
J: but the nature
B: these things happening more and more
J: yes... but isnt him in control
J: many arent supposed to die
B: much is from the destruction of the earth and its atmosphere
B: God can stop it if He wants to
J: so why didnt he
B: but God has given man free will and also allowed the world to go its course
J: but he did help in some cases, and not in others
B: yes
B: it is up to Him
J: and no one understands, right?
B: we cannot dictate God
B: but we cannot blame God
J: can we question then?
B: of course la
B: questioning is good
B: it means we are thinking
B: thinking faith is good
J: but there will be no answer
J: so why question
B: i do not think there is no answer at all
B: when God created the world, it was in very good condition
B: God ask man to manage the world
J: so what do u say... "is God fair?"
B: God is fair
B: of course
J: some people are born unlucky
J: some are born rich and easy
J: some kids are destined to die in few years
B: rich and easy does not mean better
B: hard life does not mean not so good
J: but kids are born then die in few monthes
J: is that fair
J: they dun have a choice to live
B: we are all going to die
B: some will die early some will die late
J: so will they even have a chance to go to heaven
B: of course they will
B: kids go to heaven when they die
B: they are God's children
J: but shouldnt everyone has the right to live
J: to make choices
B: when man in poor it is often man's problem
J: God gives us the right to make our own choices
B: yes
B: why are the poor nations poor?
J: yes, it may be their government's problem
J: but not their own
J: it maybe cause of the world, politics, economic
B: yes
B: the have suppressing the have nots
J: but isnt it still... should be fair?
J: coz when we are born, we have no sin
B: but the world has sin
B: so we need to help the world to go back to God
B: so the world can be better
B: that is what i am dedicating my life to do
B: that is what mission is all about
B: in our mission teams we do not give money to people
B: we help them to live a life for themselves
J: i jst think if God is the prince of peace... he should at least help
B: that is why the chruch is here to do
J: what abt god himself
B: Jesus is the head and we are the body
B: God is changing our lives so that we can do it for Him
J: he can stop the storm if he wanted to
B: sometimes he does
B: but some times he does not
J: that's the point...
B: if i go out to kill someone
B: god can stop me
B: but sometimes he does not
B: if god take over every time, then we are just robots
J: but this is nature... and god creates the nature
B: yes
B: but nature can be destroyed by man
B: we destroy the ozone layer by our pollution
B: we cut doen the trees so the flood is worse
J: if god feels sorry to watch this happen... why doesnt him help...
B: he is
J: that's the point... he sees things happen... he weeps, he feels sorry for it... but he lets it happen
B: we do the same
B: when chan yan wants to leave home
B: tony feels sad
B: he weeps
B: but he still let her go
B: god cannot stop everything
J: he doesnt have absolute control in her
J: but god does in nature
B: god does not
B: death is also a part of the natural
B: god does not stop everyone dying
B: if you drop from the roof you will get hurt
B: that is natural
B: god can stop you but he does not do it every time
J: i see...
J: so should we count on him
J: if he doesnt do it everytime
B: we can call
B: but it is his freedom to decide
J: he doesnt need to answer
B: yes
J: so how can we have faith
B: we can have faith that what he said will happen
B: but we cannot make him do what he did not say he will do
J: if he didnt say it then it's hard to have faith...
B: you do not have faith in nothing
B: faith must be based on some truth
B: or some character
B: you can trust your dad
B: that is character
B: it is a believe in someone's character
J: so it takes statistics to see if it is worth to have faith
J: but god may fail us
J: coz he doesnt choose to answer
B: man sometimes fail you
B: God will not fail
B: what God promise to do he will do
J: even things that are reasonable... he may not answer
B: if he said he will do then it will happen
J: how do we know what he promises outside the bible
B: we do not
B: that is why the bible is important
J: so everything base on the bible
B: yes
B: but sometimes God speaks to us personally
B: then we can trust those words
B: that is why we must learn to listen to his voice
B: your dad promised to take you to see nba
B: that is a promise
B: so i did
B: that is both my word and my character
B: but some times i forget
B: that is because i am human
B: but God will not
J: so if we ask sth from god... then we need to look in the bible to see if he has promised or not
B: we need to see if it is a part of his character
B: if the bible does not say for sure
B: we cannot say it will definitely happen
B: but we can still ask
J: so it invovles guessing
B: it is relying
B: like i ask you to help me
B: i cannot order you
B: but i apeal to you
J: isnt it like a blind trust then
B: no
J: if it does not happen, we say "it's ok, god chose not to do"
J: if it happens, we praise him
B: because we do have the word
B: we know he will be true to his word
B: do you trust your dad?
J: yes
B: is that blind faith
B: just because i may not do everything you ask me to do?
B: no
B: but you trust me to love you and will sacrifice for you
B: because i said i will
J: but because i can ask u, and u can tell me if u promise or not
J: it's hard to ask for sth from god then
B: but it is my freedom to promise or not
J: yes i understand
B: but i can still ask
B: i can trust that he loves me
B: because his word says so
J: so not all people can ask from god... if they duno the bible or they duno how to listen for god
B: yes
B: that is why we need to do mission
J: i see..
B: let them know the bible
J: i understand now
B: you can trust that i love you deeply
B: so it is with God

On Life

B: i miss you so much
J: :-)
B: one time you said to me that you wish you will not grow up
J: oh really? when??? haha
B: that you can sleep on my stomach all the time
J: =.="
B: when you were really small
J: yea i bet
B: sleeping on my stomach
J: haha
J: things are much simplier when we are kids
B: your know i feel like that often
B: i sometime wish you all do not grow up so that i can have you with me all the time
J: yea... parents...
B: but now you all are grown
B: you have your own life
B: i miss you all
B: but i love you to live your own life
J: i'd like to also
B: just want to bless you
B: i do not want to control you at all
B: you know that is what i am like
B: just want to bless you and help if you want my help
B: facilitate is the word
J: but not everyone can live their own life i think
B: you are such a good kid
B: i trust you fully
B: keep being yourself
B: you have the love of God in you
J: i dun think i'm a good christian
B: what is a good christian?
B: my turn to ask, haha
J: i dun read the bible, i dun really wanna go to church, and i do what the bible tells not to
J: but i do believe in God and his love
J: that's why sometimes i question
B: well you will
B: i have faith in you
B: going to church does not make you a good christian
B: trusting in God does
J: but what if there's so much sin
B: we all are sinners
B: otherwise we do not need god
J: and sometimes i do things even i know i shouldnt
B: we all do
B: that is why we need god
J: yes...
B: we all have a streak of rebellion in us
J: but i trust him, then keep doing things he doesnt like
B: but god loves us anyway
B: you will improve
B: i still love you
J: i think my influence are not really influence of christianity
J: but myself
B: i think it is the life you live
B: but you are living god's life without knowing
B: it is inbuild in you
B: it is god in you
B: it is love in you
J: i hope so
B: it is integrity
B: i sense that in you
B: i like to be your friend as well
J: haha
B: mom sometimes worries about you
J: not sometimes... it's always... =.="
B: but i do not
B: i sense god in you
J: but dun u think i'm so different from Jem...
B: no
B: not different with jem
B: she is 2 years older
B: she went through your stage as well
B: she has more purpose now
B: i love her so as well
J: she's living more like a model life
J: a life everyone would like
B: she has always been very conscious of what others think of her
J: yea i bet
J: i can tell
B: so she always try to be good
B: sometimes very hard life for her
J: that's why i said i'm different... coz sometimes i dun wanna care what others think
J: i try to be different
B: yeah
B: you are not afraid to be you
B: you are not afraid to be different
J: i'm afraid, but still wanna fight that sense of caring what others think
B: i am like you
J: i care what others think, that's why i think life is so hard
J: especially the life i'm born with
B: that is why i am attracted to you
J: but i still wanna fight back
B: i like your fighting back
J: between good and bad... obeying and fighting
B: yeah
B: be a fighter
J: in between of everything
B: all your life it is like that
B: we fight all our lives
B: if you stop fighting you lose
J: i have frds who are such good students and live a good life... but i have frds that are absolutely messed up
J: and i always feel i'm in between
B: i like your frankness
B: that is why i always try to let you be you
B: not to control you
B: but to encourage you
B: that is the beauty about you
B: you are unique
J: everyone is
B: exactly
B: so never compare yourself to jem
B: i love you as you are